[Rmtt]

Originally Posted by Now_Rudi

That's awesome man! Good for you and glad to hear. I hear all too often about how desperate people are to find someone. I tell people all the time that in order to be good for anyone else, they need to get comfortable being alone. Being in a rush and being needy will only put yourself in state that you will accept anyone or anything just to have something.

Yep ...and from there it's a snowball effect. My brother is that type. He bounces from one woman to the next kissing ass with an act he puts on.

When they see him for how he is, he moves to the next. He can't be alone for some reason.

But he will bend over backwards.....I have told him thus dies nothing but signal him as a pushover!

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Now_Rudi

The first one that comes to mind is insecurity. If a woman is insecure she IS clingy. No exception. We as humans need to feel wanted. Insecure women will go out of their way to get this dopamine boost of feeling wanted and/or needed. This goes hand in hand with number two which is overachieving to get your attention. This will be done by buying gifts, calling/texting way more than they should, making something that should be a small simple gesture into something grand. Both are HUGE red flags of this behavior.

Other traits not limited to:
Social Media Stalking - also asking lots of questions about your posts, other peoples comments or who people are.....in short this goes back to insecurity.

Inviting themselves to be somewhere you are, especially in public. If you've been dating for a while and time spent together is limited, as it can be, this is acceptable; in the early stages of dating, it is not.

Acts upset, sad or jealous if you go out without them - jealousy

Doesn't like anyone that you know that is more attractive than they are - again jealousy

Being too quiet or withholding their opinion, when you know they have one, in hopes of not upsetting you.

Suddenly not hanging out with their friends anymore or alienating themselves from their own clique, crew, squad whatever the youngsters call their posse these days.

Constant reassurance of how you feel. If they are constantly asking for your approval this causes alarm bells to ring as well.

I'm sure there are plenty more, but these are the ones to come to the forefront of my mind/experiences.

noted


on other news, i went soap shopping with a friend of mine. she's actually a cool human being and we get along very well. on the way back she said she thought i had a crush on her and i told her i thought she had a crush on me, not as a comeback but as an actual observation - looking forward to see how that unfolds.

[******]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

noted


on other news, i went soap shopping with a friend of mine. she's actually a cool human being and we get along very well. on the way back she said she thought i had a crush on her and i told her i thought she had a crush on me, not as a comeback but as an actual observation - looking forward to see how that unfolds.

Well surely you two didn’t just leave it like that!?!

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by ******

Well surely you two didn’t just leave it like that!?!

we did leave it at that because i was dropping her off at her meeting, then i stopped by the library to get some work done

for reference this is the girl i went to ikea with... im very curious to see how this plays out because i'm warming up to the idea

[bimmette]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

we did leave it at that because i was dropping her off at her meeting, then i stopped by the library to get some work done

for reference this is the girl i went to ikea with... im very curious to see how this plays out because i'm warming up to the idea

I like this idea.

[BMW F22]

Ready to start dating again so I setup a few dates this past weekend. Planned a date for last Sunday few days before that. On Saturday the plans with friends fell through so I set up a meet up with a girl for drinks. Was double booked that night but left early. Didn’t go well. She looked older in real life than pictures. Also, was pretty boring to talk to. Ended up eat a light dinner together but I knew I wasn’t interested in pursuing. Messaged her today saying as such and she agreed we didn’t really connect.

The Sunday date was much better. Picked her up in the afternoon, went to a local winery to have drinks and chatted for hours, went on a nice drive in the twisties and stopped at the top to look at Silicon Valley below. Then went to dinner. She ordered the dish I suggested and loved it. Couldn’t stop gushing over it. Dropped her off at the end and she said she had a great time. I said I’d like to see her again soon and she said yes.

[DETRoadster]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

we did leave it at that because i was dropping her off at her meeting, then i stopped by the library to get some work done

for reference this is the girl i went to ikea with... im very curious to see how this plays out because i'm warming up to the idea

Was it a 12-step program meeting?

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

we did leave it at that because i was dropping her off at her meeting, then i stopped by the library to get some work done

for reference this is the girl i went to ikea with... im very curious to see how this plays out because i'm warming up to the idea

.....in the faint distance I can already hear the bed springs singing.....

Keep us posted.

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Rmtt

Yep ...and from there it's a snowball effect. My brother is that type. He bounces from one woman to the next kissing ass with an act he puts on.

When they see him for how he is, he moves to the next. He can't be alone for some reason.

But he will bend over backwards.....I have told him thus dies nothing but signal him as a pushover!

Exactly. What I've learned is that being comfortable being alone gives you a certain "power" if you will. People notice it. I also feel like it gets you better women to choose from as they see you are choose-y and won't just settle for any warm body.

[BMW F22]

Originally Posted by Now_Rudi

Exactly. What I've learned is that being comfortable being alone gives you a certain "power" if you will. People notice it. I also feel like it gets you better women to choose from as they see you are choose-y and won't just settle for any warm body.

This. It grosses me out when guys go for just anyone.

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by BMW F22

This. It grosses me out when guys go for just anyone.

Lack of standards, morals and spine accompany this behavior as well.

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Now_Rudi

Exactly. What I've learned is that being comfortable being alone gives you a certain "power" if you will. People notice it. I also feel like it gets you better women to choose from as they see you are choose-y and won't just settle for any warm body.

in the words of the last president of my frat: the only reason your dick is dry is because of your high standards

but yeah... gotta have standards even if you are a horndog.

also, it's been more than 24 hours since julia texted me, should i be worried?

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

also, it's been more than 24 hours since julia texted me, should i be worried?

Nah my man. The only way to get a cat to come to you is to let it come to you. The more you want it to come i.e. chase it, the more it runs from you. It's ok to show interest, but don't chase.

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Now_Rudi

Nah my man. The only way to get a cat to come to you is to let it come to you. The more you want it to come i.e. chase it, the more it runs from you. It's ok to show interest, but don't chase.

that was a joke
i like the silence, more time to interact with people i see in class/buildings

[Titan9]

Originally Posted by Now_Rudi

Lack of standards, morals and spine accompany this behavior as well.

Originally Posted by BMW F22

This. It grosses me out when guys go for just anyone.

Originally Posted by Now_Rudi

Lack of standards, morals and spine accompany this behavior as well.

Slump busters are necessary.

[UncleWede]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

i went soap shopping with a friend of mine.

J/Rudi, tell him how soap shopping leads to condom shopping and using the soap together in the shower.

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by UncleWede

J/Rudi, tell him how soap shopping leads to condom shopping and using the soap together in the shower.

Looks like you just did.

I will drop another life lesson here. Do not accompany soap/shower with a condom. It will not end well. You're going to have a bad time if you do this. Trust me. Condoms should never be used with the presence of water and/or soap.

[Turkish Pickle]

no no im very particular about what goes on my hair

i meant hand soap lol ive been using dial soaps and wanted something fancier 😂

im sure you guys know this but: taking her to bath and body works is pretty much taking us to any dealership, they want everything and will tell the most minute detail about something seemingly simple 😂😂

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

no no im very particular about what goes on my hair

i meant hand soap lol ive been using dial soaps and wanted something fancier ��

im sure you guys know this but: taking her to bath and body works is pretty much taking us to any dealership, they want everything and will tell the most minute detail about something seemingly simple ����

I use this in my hand soap dispensers - the body wash, not the shampoo. I'm that guy that washes my hands potentially too often. I used to be a tattoo artist and have just continued the habit. I'm also that guy that touches a girl face and neck when initiating a kiss so having clean, manly smelling hands is key. This stuff is intended for a body wash, but it has micro-scrubbers in it and it smells manly without being over-the-top.

https://www.dove.com/us/en/men-care/...-and-clay.html

I've never thought about the subconscious verbiage spilled while shopping. I do know that if you want a man to tell you something put something in his hands to work with. He'll become focused on what is in his hands, manipulate that and not pay attention to how honest he is being. I used to do this with my kids when they were younger. Crayons and coloring books or begin playing with some of their toys with them....suddenly their psyche is an open book.

[******]

Interesting that this “dating” thread has devolved into a soap discussion... well, among the men... lol...

But speaking of Dial soap, wtf has happened to it... I’ve showered with that for decades but recently have noticed I can’t stand the smell of it anymore.... am temporarily using Irish Spring because the wife had that on hand to stick in chunks in our outdoor furniture to supposedly repel stink bugs... don’t know it works for that, but it smells better than Dial...

[Turkish Pickle]

Originally Posted by Now_Rudi

I use this in my hand soap dispensers - the body wash, not the shampoo. I'm that guy that washes my hands potentially too often. I used to be a tattoo artist and have just continued the habit. I'm also that guy that touches a girl face and neck when initiating a kiss so having clean, manly smelling hands is key. This stuff is intended for a body wash, but it has micro-scrubbers in it and it smells manly without being over-the-top.

https://www.dove.com/us/en/men-care/...-and-clay.html

I've never thought about the subconscious verbiage spilled while shopping. I do know that if you want a man to tell you something put something in his hands to work with. He'll become focused on what is in his hands, manipulate that and not pay attention to how honest he is being. I used to do this with my kids when they were younger. Crayons and coloring books or begin playing with some of their toys with them....suddenly their psyche is an open book.

thats a very different observation, im going to have to try that out some time

but for the soap i got mahogany teakwood, i have the candle already and it just smells so good! none of that extremely fruity, borderline sorority-like smell hahah

my roommate on the other hand loves his cookie scented candles

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

thats a very different observation, im going to have to try that out some time

but for the soap i got mahogany teakwood, i have the candle already and it just smells so good! none of that extremely fruity, borderline sorority-like smell hahah

my roommate on the other hand loves his cookie scented candles

Mohogany teakwood is the business!! I have Bath and Body Works wallflowers in every room in the house with that scent in them.

I will agree with the user formerly know as herdalum, very strange twists this thread takes. Never before have I publicly discussed hand soaps and the air fresheners used in my lair.