[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by Not_Judy

I need info. How long was she married? What's her personality type? Is she open or timid?

Don't know how long she was married. She has a 21-year-old daughter and a nine-year-old son if that tells you anything. I would say she is not timid

[________]

Originally Posted by Not_Judy

I need info. How long was she married? What's her personality type? Is she open or timid?

Calm down Judy, we're working her for HIM, not you...

[upstatedoc]

Another thing I noted several weeks ago is that she initiated touching me. Something I would never do to someone I was not interested in. She hugged me today in the restaurant.

[________]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Another thing I noted several weeks ago is that she initiated touching me. Something I would never do to someone I was not interested in. She hugged me today in the restaurant.

GTFO here, you're wasting our time.

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by OnerDriver

GTFO here, you're wasting our time.

I'm telling you man I guess I don't know how to read women. Maybe she's just being friendly

[upstatedoc]

So what's my next move?

[________]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

I'm telling you man I guess I don't know how to read women. Maybe she's just being friendly

She wants you. If you want her, go for it.
Be yourself and nice and all, but she wants to do stuff with you, so invite her to whatever, even if you have a new bottle of wine (you'd know what she's into). She'll say yes, and then you'll know. If you come back saying you still don't know, I'll smack you with my limp dick

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

Don't know how long she was married. She has a 21-year-old daughter and a nine-year-old son if that tells you anything. I would say she is not timid

Well shit. I'm no longer interested, you can have her. Good luck with her buddy.

Kidding aside, here is how I would handle this. I would simply send her a text and ask if she has time to actually talk. Once you get her on the phone, I would straight up just say something to the effect of, it's been a while since you've dated and you have no idea how to go about it these days. I would mention that you feel like there is an attraction between the two of you and you'd like to get to know her better. This will lower her guard and let her know that you are a genuine, non-player type of guy.....you better be a genuine guy to pull this off.

If she touched you and initiated a hug, you're golden dude.

[upstatedoc]

My gut tells me she's interested I just don't know where to go from here. Again, I do not want to compromise my son's friendship with her son. Where the hell is bimmette I need a female perspective

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by Not_Judy

Well shit. I'm no longer interested, you can have her. Good luck with her buddy.

Kidding aside, here is how I would handle this. I would simply send her a text and ask if she has time to actually talk. Once you get her on the phone, I would straight up just say something to the effect of, it's been a while since you've dated and you have no idea how to go about it these days. I would mention that you feel like there is an attraction between the two of you and you'd like to get to know her better. This will lower her guard and let her know that you are a genuine, non-player type of guy.....you better be a genuine guy to pull this off.

If she touched you and initiated a hug, you're golden dude.

Quoted for truth.

I used to think the same way OP, but I learned it is always best to just go with your gut. My mental excuse to myself was rather find out now instead of pondering it the whole time and end up empty handed. If she isn't interested (seems like she is interested based on the shared info) then you can just move on and keep the friendship.

Actually, my first post in this thread is a perfect example. That girl I had thought was just a friend and "might" be interested in me but I couldn't tell for sure. She had a friendly personality to begin with. We went to a soccer game and at the end I just went for it and ended up making out with her in the parking lot.

[Turkish Pickle]

upstatedoc, you're a doctor from the upstate area you're a smart guy. you got this
go in for the kill - if she's willing to pull off the whole wife/gf thing when you guys were at the restaurant you pretty much have an in, if she wasn't interested there's no reason she would even think of doing that. especially when she escalated before you did, you'd have to be like me to mess things up at that level.

and trust me if i have spent an hour just talking to a girl in her dorm room one on one after a party at the frat i was pledging because she was cold and wanted me to come with so that she can get a hoodie.

also onerdriver- im stealing the line "i'll smack you with my limp dick"

[nyalpine90]

[Never_Enough]

Just go for it. Worst case, you get shot down.

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by Never_Enough

Just go for it. Worst case, you get shot down.

if our boys weren't friends i would have no problem asking her out. that's the catch

[Germanauto]

So much confusion and mixed signals.

I was working with this chick on a 1-wk assignment. Pretty and smart girl who's gotten her ass kissed her entire life. Trolled her and flirted. She invites me over to her place for 3 fkin hours.

A few days later I simply ask over text to hang out and she takes it as I'm asking her on a date, something she wasn't interested in. First of all, that's not what I was asking. And secondly, don't invite guys you barely know to your place for 3 hrs and think they won't be suspicious something is brewing.

We all gonna make it...hopefully.

[CTinline-six]

Originally Posted by Germanauto

So much confusion and mixed signals.

I was working with this chick on a 1-wk assignment. Pretty and smart girl who's gotten her ass kissed her entire life. Trolled her and flirted. She invites me over to her place for 3 fkin hours.

A few days later I simply ask over text to hang out and she takes it as I'm asking her on a date, something she wasn't interested in. First of all, that's not what I was asking. And secondly, don't invite guys you barely know to your place for 3 hrs and think they won't be suspicious something is brewing.

We all gonna make it...hopefully.

Well the first issue was she has had her ass kissed her whole life. Avoid these women. They just want attention and nothing else. She wasn't worth your time man.

The funny part is by doing the opposite (ignoring her) I wouldn't be surprised if she texts you out of the blue. These girls who crave and are used to constant attention are always curious why a guy isn't like the others who constantly pamper them.

[nyalpine90]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

if our boys weren't friends i would have no problem asking her out. that's the catch

I completely understand your point, but i think she is giving you signs shes much interested in you. Invite her over and her son for a pizza night, game night and interact with her...like others suggested pay attention to her body language. do it few times and ask her out! She might say its too soon, not clearly a no but when she is ready she will come forward.

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by Germanauto

So much confusion and mixed signals.

I was working with this chick on a 1-wk assignment. Pretty and smart girl who's gotten her ass kissed her entire life. Trolled her and flirted. She invites me over to her place for 3 fkin hours.

A few days later I simply ask over text to hang out and she takes it as I'm asking her on a date, something she wasn't interested in. First of all, that's not what I was asking. And secondly, don't invite guys you barely know to your place for 3 hrs and think they won't be suspicious something is brewing.

We all gonna make it...hopefully.

I had this chick that flirted with me endlessly a few years back. She was attractive, we had a good time together, we shared a lot of same interests. She wanted to hang out constantly, either my place or hers. We had a few drinks one night and were alone. After some awkward eye gazes and body touches, I leaned in to kiss her and you would have thought I tried to rape her with the way she acted. The only time in my life I've ever experience something like this. Usually when a woman spends that much time with you she is interested.

[King Rudi]

Originally Posted by nyalpine90

I completely understand your point, but i think she is giving you signs shes much interested in you. Invite her over and her son for a pizza night, game night and interact with her...like others suggested pay attention to her body language. do it few times and ask her out! She might say its too soon, not clearly a no but when she is ready she will come forward.

Solid advice.

[Never_Enough]

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

if our boys weren't friends i would have no problem asking her out. that's the catch

Blah, shit or get off the pot.

[Joekerr]

Originally Posted by Bayerische Motoren Werke

upstatedoc, you're a doctor from the upstate area you're a smart guy. you got this
go in for the kill - if she's willing to pull off the whole wife/gf thing when you guys were at the restaurant you pretty much have an in, if she wasn't interested there's no reason she would even think of doing that. especially when she escalated before you did, you'd have to be like me to mess things up at that level.

and trust me if i have spent an hour just talking to a girl in her dorm room one on one after a party at the frat i was pledging because she was cold and wanted me to come with so that she can get a hoodie.

also onerdriver- im stealing the line "i'll smack you with my limp dick"

I don't think he's a doctor. I think he works for Department of Corrections if I recall correctly, as a correctional officer.

Which means....he might be very good at spanking. For the lucky lady in question. Especially if she's been a very naughty girl and in need of correction.

Originally Posted by upstatedoc

if our boys weren't friends i would have no problem asking her out. that's the catch

You've given a fair bit more background now, what with initiating touching and that - you know that you are good. We know you are good. And even better, the boys already get along nicely.

You need to stop overanalyzing the situation now and take further action. I applaud you for the text invitation and taking that step - that was an excellent first step. From there, you should have picked up that she's interested, but has a legitimate excuse. Try, try again.

Inviting her for drinks while the boys are having the birthday party might be good. I don't think you need to make it about an excuse - I think you need to be clearer that you are interested now, so that she knows. She's looking for signals from you too.

Maybe a gentle spanking. Just trying to play to your strengths...

[upstatedoc]

Originally Posted by Joekerr

I don't think he's a doctor. I think he works for Department of Corrections if I recall correctly, as a correctional officer.

I was just being a dick when I said doc stood for dept of corrections. And that was years ago you have a good memory