[MKSixer]

Originally Posted by OnerDriver

I find this quite interesting as my friend told me that she didn't believe things like this still happened until she started dating me. Is it confirmation bias or just increased situational awareness?

I think you are definitely more aware of these situations as you experience them first-hand. My previous post talks about some "naïvety" that exists, and is confirmed by your date lack of awareness in this case.

There were quite a few words he could have used to describe me but he went to that place. Why would he do that? He's racist.

If you can give me a satisfactory answer when I'm wearing a 1500 suit and I'm clearly intelligent based on our conversation. He could have simply state, "Hey, I'm sure he's a nice guy but if you ever get tired of him, hit me up...here's my number". I know this because it happens. Guys have hit on her before and I don't mind paying what I call the, "pretty girl tax". Guys hit on hot women. If you don't like it, don't date a hot woman. He chose to use a racially charged word. His choice. Nothing to do with me besides my phenotype.

What is the excuse for this? There's no excuse. And many people think like him but do not convey the message with the same choice of words. He is racist and not ashamed of it (or drunk enough to let his inner thoughts out).

Again: we're not arguing that racism exists... Unfortunately it does, and I think it always will. If not "black or white", it is with some other form that humans create to create dissent and live in silos.

Thanks for taking the time and to your earlier point, we were discussing the finer points of this and not in complete disagreement. I see it from your point that it may be more comfortable to live without thinking of this odious behavior but I don't have that luxury.

I have really enjoyed this discussion and hope we can have more on BP OT of this nature. Respectful discourse.

Cheers-mk