11-24-2017, 12:46 PM | #23 | ||
...
11825
Rep 15,400
Posts |
Quote:
So, can i tell you about how i calm myself with murder plans? They tend to be math heavy after five minutes, so i picture stuff like giving her a mink coat made from living, trained minks. First you have to buy the animals, then the feeding cost, the training will take about ten years and i assume a loss of 60% since my dogs will probably eat a ton of them by accident. Now feeding 40 minks for ten years means i have to guarantee a raw fish or meat feed for ten years (+60% percent) and i need to hire 12 people full time to train them to do tricks like hanging on to each other for as long as it will take an 80 year old woman to put on a coat that'll weigh 60kilos. That'll probably be an issue, but first i have to step up on my fishing hobby by catching over 10 kilos of fish per day and for that i will need about 16 hours per day (i love fishing, i just suck at it!). Anyway, that plan calmed me down a few months ago, when my mom spoke with my kids without an adult supervision for five minutes. I had to give up on it since training minks, or owning them as pets is illegal here, and they are an environmental hazard. Anyway, the minks were supposed to eat her, but they as all wild animals don't like salt in their food so this plan had some flaws, but if we ignore all the flaws in this plan (and the fact that I'm a pacifist) it was a good plan!
__________________
Quote:
|
||
Appreciate
1
Joekerr7929.00 |
11-24-2017, 12:47 PM | #24 |
First Lieutenant
378
Rep 317
Posts |
I consider myself very lucky as I have no shitty people that I need to buy presents for. In fact I don't have anyone other my wife, my 3 kids and my dog on my list.
But if I did know shitty people I had to buy gifts for, I'd just get them something vegan. |
Appreciate
0
|
11-24-2017, 12:48 PM | #25 | |
Banned
7929
Rep 1,923
Posts |
Quote:
The takeaway then, is that we should take much from the Bible instead. I'm guessing that's what you meant. Right? |
|
Appreciate
0
|
11-24-2017, 12:50 PM | #26 | ||
...
11825
Rep 15,400
Posts |
Quote:
I hate you.
__________________
Quote:
|
||
Appreciate
0
|
11-24-2017, 12:53 PM | #27 | |
Banned
7929
Rep 1,923
Posts |
Quote:
Ahhh, maths. When I wrote my CPA exam they decided to make one of the three cases about ostriches. And they gave a set example of how many eggs one female could lay, and the percentage of those that would be female. We then had to estimate size needed to sustain to a certain desired income, factoring taxes and a bunch of other crappy stuff. Driving home that day after, honestly, if I had seen an ostrich in Canada (as extremely rare as that would be), I'd have stopped the car and throttled it. Hated ostriches for a few days after. Fortunately, I found out I passed a few months later, so that made me feel a little less hate towards those two legged creatures. |
|
Appreciate
1
Lups11824.50 |
11-24-2017, 12:53 PM | #28 | ||
...
11825
Rep 15,400
Posts |
Quote:
Edit: Ah, he was her boss. Then that's bad for real and he deserves his chickens.
__________________
Quote:
|
||
Appreciate
1
///M Power-Belgium63031.00 |
11-24-2017, 01:02 PM | #29 | ||
...
11825
Rep 15,400
Posts |
Quote:
We had some biology/ math classes like that in 8-9 grade. Turtle eggs, temps, probabilities and how to next generation, when males and females act differently. I fucking swear. You put an animal in math, and you hate it for life.
__________________
Quote:
|
||
Appreciate
0
|
11-24-2017, 02:54 PM | #30 | |
General
63031
Rep 24,597
Posts |
Quote:
Wait ?!?! ... I thought Mary (The holy virgin Mary) was a virgin ? While the s@cker banged her in the church (The house of God) I'm pretty sure he knew her from the bible . In nomine Patris et Filii et Spiritus Sancti ! In English for you guys => "In the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost/Spirit" Amen.. On the other hand , I only believe what I can see . And for the moment he sees only his chickens .
__________________
"MAX VERSTAPPEN" IS THE 2021+2022+2023 F1 WORLD CHAMPION - #UnLeashTheLion
BPM DEV-Tune & DCT Software-Tune & Servotronic & coding ///Alpine HID Angeleyes ///Oem.exhaust mod. |
|
Appreciate
0
|
11-24-2017, 02:59 PM | #31 |
General
63031
Rep 24,597
Posts |
Anna , I'm pretty sure you know what they say about weird dudes and chickens..
__________________
"MAX VERSTAPPEN" IS THE 2021+2022+2023 F1 WORLD CHAMPION - #UnLeashTheLion
BPM DEV-Tune & DCT Software-Tune & Servotronic & coding ///Alpine HID Angeleyes ///Oem.exhaust mod. |
Appreciate
0
|
11-24-2017, 03:07 PM | #32 | |
Banned
7929
Rep 1,923
Posts |
Quote:
None of this makes any sense to me. I'm still trying to decipher whether the maid's name was Mary (in which case, he didn't know her from the Bible), or if you are talking about the Mary in the Bible (virgin Mary), which he didn't "bang". It's all very confusing. |
|
Appreciate
1
Lups11824.50 |
11-24-2017, 03:31 PM | #33 | |
General
63031
Rep 24,597
Posts |
Quote:
Of course Mary is in the bible , so our priest thought this is my chance ... But I really wonder if Mary washed also his feet (and balls) with her hair ..
__________________
"MAX VERSTAPPEN" IS THE 2021+2022+2023 F1 WORLD CHAMPION - #UnLeashTheLion
BPM DEV-Tune & DCT Software-Tune & Servotronic & coding ///Alpine HID Angeleyes ///Oem.exhaust mod. |
|
Appreciate
0
|
11-24-2017, 06:37 PM | #34 | ||
Banned
7779
Rep 2,602
Posts
Drives: MW Vespa w/pink racing stripes
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Peeing in your garden
|
Quote:
|
||
Appreciate
2
MKSixer34173.50 ///M Power-Belgium63031.00 |
11-25-2017, 06:32 AM | #35 | |
General
63031
Rep 24,597
Posts |
Quote:
But hey .. Don't give up my friends ,one day you will make it ! It's only a matter of time => https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Homo_e...2012-05-17.jpg
__________________
"MAX VERSTAPPEN" IS THE 2021+2022+2023 F1 WORLD CHAMPION - #UnLeashTheLion
BPM DEV-Tune & DCT Software-Tune & Servotronic & coding ///Alpine HID Angeleyes ///Oem.exhaust mod. |
|
Appreciate
0
|
11-26-2017, 02:26 AM | #36 |
Major General
13342
Rep 7,484
Posts |
I don't bother. If I don't like someone they won't get a present, period. Only exception is the secret santa at work. I buy the tackiest el cheapo gift like washing up gloves with pink tinsel on them... it surprises me how many people genuinely appreciate tack!
|
11-26-2017, 06:19 AM | #37 |
Major General
2950
Rep 5,984
Posts |
I don't participate in secret Santa at work.
|
Appreciate
0
|
11-26-2017, 07:52 AM | #38 | |
Major General
13342
Rep 7,484
Posts |
Quote:
|
|
Appreciate
0
|
11-27-2017, 09:51 AM | #42 | |
Long Time Admirer, First Time Owner
17961
Rep 9,377
Posts |
Quote:
|
|
Appreciate
0
|
11-27-2017, 12:44 PM | #44 | |
...
11825
Rep 15,400
Posts |
When you have kids the relatives crawl through the door and then you need the small happy moments during the damn santa day (here we have a santa visiting every damn house, we don't do mall santas since the finns are sick, sick, SICK people).
__________________
Quote:
|
|
Appreciate
0
|
Post Reply |
Bookmarks |
Thread Tools | Search this Thread |
|
|